Saturday, February 18, 2012

Bathroom Review--Cole Field House

As the basketball team moves into the Comcast Center, we would be remiss if we did not pay tribute to Cole Field House--home of one of the greatest sets of bathrooms on campus. Now in service for orientations, peace lectures, and large- scale comedy tours, Cole was once home to crowds of over 14,500 people for championship basketball. A lesser bathroom might have crumbled--Cole rose to the occasion.

The bathrooms in Cole are designed with utility in mind. Nothing fancy in there--it gives only what you need. A row of about a dozen stalls service the every need of students

who've just had an arena hot dog, providing ample room and clean services. The urinals are arranged in the middle of the room, with each row attached to a low- rise tile wall. This creates the somewhat awkward situ- ation of staring at a powerful alumni while you relieve yourself, and since no urinal etiquette exists (to my knowledge), you should deal with this at your own discre- tion.

After completing the task at hand, one proceeds into the next room to clean up. This is a feature sorely missing from modern day bathrooms--the separate washroom that gives it that special "hotel lobby bath- room" feeling. Unfortunately, only cold water is available, and the always-open win- dows provide a strange view of the tennis courts. Finally, one can stare at the fun- house mirror (which gives the appearance of blurry drunkenness) before return- ing to the concourse.

No doubt, Cole Field house holds a special place in all our hearts. But only its bathroom holds a special place in our colons.

Rating: 3 1/2 out of 4 flushes

Directions: Go past the Union to Cole Field House, entering at the main entrance. Go to the left, then hang a right around the con- cession stands. The bath- room mentioned is on your left. Watch out for joggers.

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